


The Safety Dance

by NympheSama



Category: Endless Summer (Visual Novel)
Genre: Crack-ish, M/M, Song fic, Taylor is a doofus, stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-29
Packaged: 2019-07-04 02:39:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15832056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NympheSama/pseuds/NympheSama
Summary: Taylor has to entertain himself for a short timeJake is unimpressed.





	The Safety Dance

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Redmoog](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redmoog/gifts).



> Okay well this is the first of a few one shots, crack fics I guess kinda - just... I don't entirely know where it came from... But, here it is. Hope you enjoy...
> 
> x My love to you all x

 

Taylor downed the last of his Tequila Rosé shots, slamming his glass down onto the table top, as he looked around his friends with a sappy grin. "You guys... are just, the best guys... to ever, be my guys..."

  
"This is exactly, why I don't let him drink." Jake sighed from the nearby bar, rolling his eyes as Taylor turned an adoring, if somewhat drunken smile his way. "He's an utter idiot at the best of times, put alcohol in him and he's a complete lost cause." The pilot said, as Taylor pouted, pushing to his feet and stumbling over to his lover.

  
"You're being very mean..." He complained, tugging at Jake's jacket lapels as he leaned against him suggestively. "Are you gonna be this mean to me all night? 'Cause I have some very specific ideas about what I wanna do once we get back upstairs..." He hummed, leaning forward to kiss Jake's throat tenderly, if somewhat sloppily.

  
"Guess it depends on you, and how much of an idiot ya are." Jake smirked knowingly, though he tilted his head back to allow Taylor better access to his throat. "If you don't fall asleep the second you hit the bed, like last time, then maybe I'll give you what you want."

  
" _Jaaaake_..!" Taylor whined, nipping the pilots ear sharply. "You're such a tease!" He complained, pouting as Jake began to laugh.

  
"You literally have your hand down my trousers right now, how am I the goddamn tease here?" He asked, his cheeks flushing with a dull stain of heat, as Taylor looked down in surprise to see the pilot spoke the truth.

  
"Huh..." He hummed in surprise, blinking dazedly, before turning up to Jake with a huge grin. "How did that happen?" He asked, giggling when Jake rolled his eyes, though he hissed quietly when Taylor squeezed his shaft gently.

  
"I wonder." Jake snarked, looking down at Taylor with a heated gaze. The pilot sighed, reluctantly reaching for Taylors wrist and drawing his hand free of his trousers. "I'll make ya a promise, Boy Scout... You sober up enough to stay awake, and I'll give ya the ride of ya life... all night long."

  
Taylor pouted, groaning in disappointment. "But... that'll take ages..!" He complained, as Jake snorted and rolled his eyes, gently pushing him away so he would stick to his plan.

  
"Well, maybe that'll teach ya not to get drunk again." He said, turning Taylor and swatting him on the ass affectionately, chuckling as Taylor yelped and took a reluctant step away from the pilot. "Go on, go amuse yaself until ya sobered up. Come an' get me, once ya ain't picklin' anymore." He ordered, sniggering at his own hilarity, and Taylors distressed expression as he turned back to his own drink on the bar.

  
"Pfft, I'm gonna get so sober, you'll... uh, you'll..." Taylor began, before trailing off as his words failed him. "Er..." Jake began to laugh at his confused frown, shaking his head as Taylor pouted and stuck out his tongue. With a sniff, Taylor stalked away from the bar, his gait unsteady and more than a little wobbly. He ignored Jake's laughter, stomping over to the nearby fountain, and scowling up at Rourke's smug statue. "You can shut up too!" He growled, offering the statue a rude gesture involving his middle finger, as it seemed to laugh down at him.

"Stupid Top Gun... Stupid Rourke... Stupid... Island..." He muttered, hiccupping, before narrowing his eyes and hopping into the fountain, sloshing through the water to the statue and slowly beginning to climb it. The bracing water shocked him somewhat, but his determination won out over his sobriety, pushing him to climb to the very top of the statue, and stand upon Rourke's head.  
"Haha, I just climbed Mount Everett!" He cheered from the top, eliciting at least three groans that he heard, and several sharp barks of laughter from those who were at least as drunk as himself. "But... I have a very serious thing to say next. It's that all of you, are my friends and I love you all so much, and especially; my Top Gun! Even though he's very mean, and won't have sex with me right now..." He babbled, as Jake choked on his drink and scowled up at him from the bar. "I still love him, 'cause I'm in for the long haul, not just the sex! Wooo! But seriously, it's such good sex.... Oh wait, wait! That wasn't the thing. That wasn't the thing. Wait, let me think..."

  
Taylor frowned, looking over at Jake, as he rolled his eyes and quickly downed another drink, shaking his head and blatantly muttering to himself.  "I have to 'sober up' right now..." He mumbled, shuffling along Rourke's huge head and wiggling his ass suggestively at the pilot. "But I really don't think I'm that drunk, so; I thought I should just let you all know that I really, really love and appreciate you all... and also..." He paused, frowning as he tried to remember what it was that had seemed to important he needed to tell his friends; right away. "Also... uh..."

  
Taylor paused, before he broke out in a wide grin, spreading his arms as he gazed down at his friends. " _We can dance if we want to. We can leave your friends behind_." He cried, bursting into song as he shuffled in a rough approximation of what could have been called dancing, while his friends guffawed from below.

 _"'Cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance, well they're, no friends of mine..!"_ He sang, as Quinn and Michelle linked arms and began to skip in lazy circles as they giggled.

  
 _"Say, we can go where we want to. A place where they will never find."_ He huffed, strutting his way over Rourke's head and climbing up his raised arm, holding onto the statues high fingers and pretending he was pole dancing _. "And we can act like we come from out of this world. Leave the real one far behind.._!" He sang, letting go of Rourke's fingers so he could point out into the distance dramatically.  
" _And we can dance-"_ he said, beginning to wiggle his ass in an odd gesture which could have been labeled dancing.

"We can sing!" Diego cried, as he bounced over on a pogo stick, hopping over the fountain edge to splash around the circle basin below the statue.

  
"Dude, where the hell did you even find that..?" Taylor asked, laughing as he almost fell off the statue in his attempts to look down and see his friend.

  
"There's a buncha weird ass stuff in the closet over there..." Diego giggled, bouncing around in the water gleefully. "I think Rourke's sanity is in there somewhere!" He said, and Taylor laughed uproariously with his friends at the witty joke.

  
"Dude, I don't think you should be doing that in water..." He warned, snickering at the innocent confusion on his friends face.

  
"Huh? Why?" Diego asked, bouncing all the higher as he splashed around the statue quickly. As he landed, the pogo stick suddenly slipped on the bottom of the fountain, sending Diego face first into the water. "Ack! Fountain water!" He spluttered, as Taylor clung to Rourke's huge fingers and laughed even harder.

  
"Oh my god, dude that was hilarious!" He gasped, shaking his head as he peered down at Diego in wide eyed amusement. "Again! Again, again!" He cheered, as the rest of their friends giggled behind their hands.

  
"Shut up, ya idjit..." Diego muttered, scowling at Taylors continued amusement. "At least I'm not riding Rourke!" He laughed, as Taylor snickered and looked over at Jake, waving his eyebrows suggestively at the scowling pilot.

  
"I know who I'd rather be riding..." He said, snickering as Jake's scowl deepened, and he grabbed another drink to drown his frustration. "But... its okay. I can wait... You know why?" He hummed, almost falling in the fountain himself as he wandered unsteadily across Rourke's head to lean against his other hand.

  
"Tell us, Taylor!" Raj cheered, waving his hands in the air as he spun in a brief circle, laughing when he bumped into Craig and the jock splashed his drink in his face.

  
"Aw, man... Now I smell like the AggroCraig..!" He complained, before bursting out laughing, as he saw Diego float past in the fountain; pretending to be a fountain himself, as he blew a stream of water into the air.

  
"Still better than how you smelt before, ya dork." Zahra sniggered, laughing when Craig turned to catch her and kiss her, but instead caught hold of Estela, who immediately punched him in the face.

  
Taylor laughed along, before strutting his way back to Rourke's head and pointing down at his friends, rocking his hips suggestively. " _We can go when we want to! The night is young and so am I..."_ He sang, winking as Sean whistled at him and threw him a melon, which he promptly ducked, causing it to splatter across a mural of Rourke in a toga.

" _And we can dress real neat from our hats to our feet, and surprise 'em with the victory cry_!" He cheered, laughing at Rourke's ruined mural, while offering Sean a proud thumbs up.

  
" _Say, we can act if we want to! If we don't, nobody will_..." Taylor hummed, waving his hands above his head in a rough resemblance of Rourke's statue. " _And you can act real rude and totally removed... and I can act like an imbecile..!"_ He sang, grinning as he leapt down from the statues head to splash into the fountain, splashing his friends.

  
"I believe you've already mastered that act, Taylor..." Aleister drawled, as he spun past with Grace, twirling her in an elegant waltz.

  
" _And say, we can dance, we can dance... Everything's out of control_!" Taylor sang, ignoring Aleister's quick comment. " _We can dance, we can dance. They're doing it from pole to pole..!"_ He continued, strutting forward to grind his hips between Quinn and Michelle briefly.

" _We can dance, we can dance. Everybody look at your hands_..!" He sang, smirking as the pair of giggling girls caught hold of Estela and dragged her behind a changing screen with an indignant squeak. _"We can dance, we can dance. Everybody's taking the chance_..!" He sang, shuffling forward to where Diego was pretending to play piano on a cheeseboard.

  
 _"Safety dance_!" Taylor sang, clapping his hands as he began shuffling his feet in a nonsensical pattern across the floor _. "Oh well, the safety dance!"_ He cheered, swinging his hips in wide figure eights as he raised his hands over his head and waved them slowly.

 _"Ah yes, the safety dance!"_  
Taylor shuffled forward, winking at Raj as he skipped out of the kitchen with a large basket of tomatoes and eggs _. "We can dance if we want to. We've got all your life and mine..."_ He hummed, snickering as Sean and Craig began to draw the food from the basket, hefting in their palms thoughtfully. " _As long as we abuse it, never gonna lose it... Everything'll work out right!"_ He continued, turning at the sound of Estela's frustrated shriek.

 _"I say, we can dance if we want to! We can leave your friends behind_..." He sang, pausing to laugh as Estela walked out stiffly from behind the screen, dressed in an old fashioned ball gown, her hair curled into ringlets. " _Because your friends don't dance and if they don't dance, well they're, no friends of mine!"_ Taylor cheered, grinning goofily at Estela, as Quinn and Michelle skipped out from behind the screen with joyful giggles, dressed in similar old fashioned clothing.

  
 _"I say, we can dance, we can dance... Everything's out of control._ " Taylor chanted, looking back to the football players, as they pelted Rourke's statue with tomatoes and eggs. _"We can dance, we can dance... We're doing it from pole to pole_." He said, hopping onto a nearby table and wiggling his hips as if he were pole dancing.

 _"We can dance, we can dance... Everybody look at your hands_!" He called, waving hos own in the air and wiggling his fingers. _"We can dance, we can dance... Everybody's taking the chance!"_ He drawled, ignoring Aleister as he twirled past with Grace once more, instead watching Michelle and Quinn as they dragged Estela around the nearest table.

  
 _"Oh well, the safety dance... Ah yes, the safety dance!_ " He chanted, hopping down from the table and taking Diego's offered arm, skipping over to the girls.  
" _Oh well, the safety dance... Oh well, the safety dance! Oh yes, the safety dance..!"_ He sang, twirling his way through the girls as they giggled, and Estela scowled at him.

  
" _Oh, the safety dance, yeah_..." He sang, winking at the dark haired girl with a grin. " _Well, it's the safety dance! It's the safety dance.._!" He huffed, aiming finger guns at Sean and Craig, though they never stopped throwing their perishables to return the gesture.

  
 _"Well, it's the safety d_ ance..." Taylor sang, leaning back as he half shuffled and half hopped towards the bar, a sly grin curling his lips as he watched Zahra sit and swing on a chandelier, as she poured champagne over Craig's head _. "Oh, it's the safety dance._.." He hummed, chuckling as he watched Sean laugh and jump up to grab the chandelier, spinning it quickly and causing Zahra to laugh drunkenly, holding on for dear life.

  
 _"Oh, it's the safety dance_..." He continued, as Estela finally gave in and danced with Quinn and Michelle, twirling unsteadily across the floor with them. " _Oh, it's the safety dance!"_ He sang, strutting proudly across the room, and finally bouncing to a stop before Jake, his arms spread wide gleefully, as he ignored the pandemonium behind him that he'd caused.

  
For a long pause, Jake said nothing, taking a long drink as Taylor fidgeted impatiently for his attention. Finally the pilot turned towards him, raising a brow as he set his glass back on the bar. "Feelin' proud of yaself, are ya?" He drawled, as Taylor grinned and nodded giddily as he giggled. "... Thought ya might." The pilot hummed, shaking his head as he glanced behind Taylor, watching Diego get a piggy back ride from Raj around the fountain. "Well, Boy Scout... I think its time to call it a night." The pilot finally sighed, pushing away from the bar and turning away, glancing back at Taylors distressed whine. "What?"

  
"You promised-" Taylor pouted, as Jake smirked and half turned back towards him.

  
"If ya sobered up, yeah." He snorted, anticipating Taylors argument. "That little display don't exactly scream sober, Boy Scout." He chuckled, winking as he turned around and offered a rough salute. "See ya in the mornin', Boy Scout."

  
"Jake..." Taylor protested, hesitating a moment in shock, before hurrying after the pilot. "Jake no, that's not fair!" He complained, as Jake ignored him and kept moving. "Jake! Jake, c'mon! I'm sober now, Top Gun! I promise!" He pleaded, as Jake laughed and held the elevator door for him to catch up, smirking as Taylor blushed and stepped in beside him. "You're mean..." He muttered, as Jake snickered and finally allowed the elevator doors to close, scooping Taylor up to press him to a wall.

  
"Trust me, Boy Scout..." The pilot murmured, capturing his lips in a deep and heated kiss which stole Taylors remaining ability to think. "You ain't seen nothin' yet." He drawled quietly, smirking as he pulled back to wink at Taylor. "Wait 'til you wake up achin' from more than just ya hangover tomorrow... before I make ya clean up ya mess..!"

  
Taylor scowled at the pilot, deciding that no man should be so ridiculously attractive while being so unfair and mean. He grabbed the pilots jacket and drew him into another passionate kiss, only for the elevator doors to ping open.

  
Jake watched in amusement as Taylor stalked out ahead of him, stumbling twice on his way to their room, before choosing and trying to force the wrong door only to fall backwards into the right door opposite it. By the time he'd caught up and closed the door behind him, he found Taylor sprawled face first across the bed, his shirt pulled off of only one arm and one shoe off; as he snored softly. Jake rolled his eyes and cursed himself for loving an idiot, even one so amusing and utterly adorable, as Taylor.


End file.
